Gumby Wannabe. Pinky Impostor.

I thought about posting all of my non-published blogs all at once in a random conglomeration of goodness. But didn’t. They were never published for a good reason. They sucked.

Then I started thinking about Gumby.  That is strange. Really strange. Right?

Not so strange.  Here is why…

Fact: I am stubborn and as much as I would like to say that I am flexible…I am not (I get that from my pops). I can, however,  do a back-bend, but that is about as flexible as I get. I still can’t believe I made it into the Peace Corps. They asked me over and over, “Would you consider yourself a flexible person?”. “ABSOLUTELY” I responded over and over. No really.. I sat in the Starbucks at REI and said that to my recruiter.. like 3 times. I should add Pro-Bullshitter to my resume. Editing……Done.

What does this have to do with interruptions? Good question. Well since June 14th, that’s the day that I decided to make some major changes in my life, things have gotten hairy, gnarly, and left me feeling a bit RAW. I am not going to tell you what changes I made…

1. Because you will think I am crazy

2. As much as I would like to say that I don’t care what you think… I do. Damn.

3. It’s personal and I am a classy, tactful lady. Duh : )

Equally as random and 49% unrelated… have you ever seen that show “Pinky and the Brain”? Well if not you aren’t missing much, but if you have you know what I am talking about. The basic rundown is the Brain is a genius, while Pinky is somewhat insane. The two mice initiate schemes for world domination, only to have them ultimately fail. Got it? What’s my deal with 80’s cartoon references? Weird.

Anyways this week I ‘decided’ to go cold turkey off of coffee (worst sentence structure ever. whatever.). Hmm well I only somewhat decided. You see after going an entire day without caffeine (due to the fact I slept most of the day), I  got this grand idiotic idea to kick the good ole coffee habit.  In an effort of further self-improvement (world domination) and to insure my teeth wouldn’t fall out in two years,  I geared up to tackle my habit…cough cough addiction. I am PINKY…clearly not the Brain in this scheme of self-improvement/world domination.

I’m INSANE. Literally and figuratively. Figuratively because I love coffee and the sense of community it represents. I mean seriously people I want to open a coffee shop with my pops and call it “Like Father, Like Daughter” GENIUS RIGHT?! (he hasn’t jumped on board yet, but a girl can dream). But seriously… I freaking love coffee.

Literally I felt like I was going insane this week/ I completely lost it at about 8:30 pm tonight. I couldn’t sort out if it was sleep deprivation from my graveyard shifts or coffee withdrawals. Well it is safe to say that my insanity stemmed mostly from caffeine withdrawals.

Symptoms googled/ experienced:

1.) Headache: OMG non-stop.

2.) Sleepiness: all day everyday since Tuesday

3.)  Irritability: haha. yep. Sorry if you experienced some of my road rage/or just rage : )

4.) Lethargy: went to the grocery store only because I literally had a can of tuna to eat… I bought carrots and left. Got home and went straight to sleep…again

5.) Depression: oooo the scary D word. Crying for no apparent reason. Check

6.) Flu-like symptoms: Yep.

I could go on, but I will spare you the details. Moment of clarity came tonight around 8:30 when my dad said, “Schanell go buy a coffee, and enjoy life.” Check. I ordered a large Almond Milk Latte and got some dark chocolate.

I felt better almost immediately. : ) Minus I have a stomach ache from excessive chocolate consumption.

What I learned…

1.) Total world domination/self-improvement cannot happen in one week. Extend some grace to yourself. Give yourself a break. You are awesome.

2.) Learn to take things as they come.

3.) Enjoy the simple things in life.

4.) Listen to your parents. They know what’s best for you.

Thanks for reading.

Now who wants to get some coffee with me?!?!?!?

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6 Responses to Gumby Wannabe. Pinky Impostor.

  1. Julie says:

    I’m dying to know what all the major life changes were (aside from coffee) that made you feel gnarly and hairy!!!!

  2. Rose says:

    Call Me we will schedule a Starbucks visit !

  3. Sonia says:

    Schanell, don’t give up coffee. Seriously. I tried it once. It was bad. It’s such an enjoyable beverage.

  4. Gale Neiderworder says:

    You a day without coffee 🙂 next?

  5. Sharon says:

    Schanell, I found this entry very soul searching. Drink your coffee in moderation and enjoy every swallow of it. I do and not insane yet. As for chocolate, one cannot live without it. Gotta love you, Girl!!!!!!

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